Blissful Belle

Be Happy, Feel Beautiful

How To: Deal With A Frenemy


Belles, we’ve all got them, the ever-present frenemy! For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term “frenemy,” it is an enemy disguised as a friend; someone who is in constant competition with you and they usually never have your best interest at heart. If this sounds like someone you have in your life, then keep reading on how to effectively one up this devilish acquaintance.

Remain Aloof: If the said frenemy enters a room, don’t make a bee-line for the escape door, instead stick around and chat it up; let her know you are unfazed! Air kiss away your inclinations to scratch her eyes out when she shows up with your ex-boyfriend or friend, or whoever it is that she now has under her spell!

Shoulders Back: Rock some bad girl posture when she’s around! Standing with your shoulders back and your spine straight will give the signal of relaxation and confidence. Standing like this will showcase how unintimidating you find her.

Your Lips are Sealed: So, this girl will of course offer her shoulder to cry on in need but it’s not out of genuine concern for your well-being. Instead it’s to be able to blab about it later to others. Don’t allow this to happen to you. Talk to someone you know you can trust, whoever you know that will never gossip about your private information in public. Given the slightest piece of juicy information this frenemy will sing like a canary! And if she’s really the evil genius you know she is then she’ll announce it in front of everyone and publically take pity on you. So zip it up ladies, and keep those lips sealed!

Don’t Gossip about her: When having a frenemy you must keep in mind that you too are a frenemy, therefore gossiping about your “friend” is a no-no! Remind yourself why you put up with this chick in the first place, maybe you run in the same circles or even work together. Regardless, you know that this enemy is a pretend friend for a specific reason so there’s no need to push her in front of a bus (a la Mean Girls). Besides choosing to burn bridges might do more harm than good, imagine if she wasn’t pretending to be your BFF! Not that I’m suggesting we all have phony friends but in some instances I see how they might be useful to maintain. So don’t talk about her to people you know are her friends, since it will eventually get back to her. Therefore putting you in a bad situation and giving her a real reason to cause conflict.

Don’t be Fooled: Don’t be fooled by the rocks that she’s got; she’s just another chick from the block! So she’s engaged, she’s a Victoria Secret model, she’s cured cancer, WHATEVER! She’s no better than you and until you start believing that you’ll always be intimidated by this sole frenemy. (Although as a side note if your frenemy cures cancer, maybe she is better than you, just saying!). It’s important to focus your energy on your life, like achieving the goals you set and so forth. Maybe your frenemy has achieved what you want, if so that’s okay to, just remember that “anything she can do you can do better!”

So, remember to keep those chins up my lovely Belles!

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About Alexandra Palmer

Alexandra is a native New Yorker who's always had a keen interest in news. She was drawn to the industries fast paced and deadline driven environments. She recently graduated with a Masters of Arts in multimedia journalism from New York University, where she specialized in video production, reporting, and editing. Some of her most prominent accomplishments include an investigative piece on campus sexual assault her and fellow NYU student Rajeev Dhir published in Al Jazeera America in February. Alexandra has also interned at several prestigious news outlets, including MSNBC's Ronan Farrow Daily Show, and Us Weekly. Alexandra's interests outside of journalism include, acting for film and television. Alexandra recently wrote and starred in her first one act play this August. The piece was selected as a semi-finalist in the New York New Works Theatre Festival. Writing is Alexandra's first love. Alexandra is also graduate of Marymount Manhattan College with a Bachelor of Arts in English and World Literature, and a minor in Hispanic Studies.

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This entry was posted on October 13, 2011 by in How-to, Savvy Belle and tagged , , , , , , .
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